Insecurities?

Okay, true to my usual form, I finished Whole30 and then went on a little bender for a bit. Now I’m mostly back on track with the exception of last night (Girls Night Out at the Melting Pot which got a little out of hand, haha).

I’ve been eating more lacto-paleo or primal (paleo + dairy). And after having a stuffy nose for a few days and struggling with some mild acne, I’m probably going to try a 10 elimination period with no dairy to see if that helps. I’m not excited about it, especially given how much I love cheese! But if I really need to be without dairy to get back to 100%, that’s just what has to happen.

Anyway, that’s not what I came here to write about…

I feel like I’ve come a long way. My weight loss journey officially started at about 213 pounds. I lost 13 pounds on Weight Watchers and plateaued, then fluctuated for a while between 190 and 200 on various diets. When I found Paleo, I dropped down to 190, then 177 on my latest Whole30. In my adventures the last few weeks, I’ve bounced back up to an even 180 but that’s not too bad… I’ve had a number of non-scale victories including the purchase of a pair of knee high boots (impossible with my huge calves), having to resize my wedding and engagement ring, and fitting in to all the dresses in my closet. However, I’m still insecure.

This morning as I was eating my breakfast (3 egg omelet with spinach, mushrooms, ham, and cheese in case you were wondering), I saw a Victoria’s Secret catalog on my coffee table and this image was on the cover:

I felt a little queasy, like the floor had dropped out from under me. I know I don’t look like this girl and I probably never will (AND I don’t necessary think that is a bad thing, FYI). However, I just had this reaction to the photo that upset me. It’s like with all the progress I’ve made, I don’t feel any more secure when I see these images than what I did when I was 213 pounds!

It makes me sad, very sad. I should be extremely proud of all I have accomplished and I should continue making strides towards getting better (which I do). So then why does one little image start me thinking that things are hopeless and I’ll never reach my goals?

I know this is a personal problem, a question only I can answer but I needed to get it out of my head…

In other news, I will be starting Jillian Michaels Body Revolution on Monday – so excited! I’ll keep y’all posted with progress, results, and probably some minor whining too 😉

 

Whole30 Complete!

I have completed the Whole30 for the second time! I’m excited and happy, moreso about my results than anything else.

This time around, I lost 13 pounds – 13 POUNDS! and a total of 12.5 inches over my whole body! I’m so proud and happy with these results. I also feel pretty good, especially considering that I have a bad upper respiratory infection right now. Oh well, can’t win them all!

My plan from here is to start the reintroduction schedule. I will start with dairy, then non-gluten grains, and then legumes. I know that gluten is included on the official Whole30 reintroduction schedule but I don’t plan on reintroducing gluten so I’m skipping it. The more time goes on, the more I realize that gluten is a major problem in my life, Celiac diagnosis or no.

Please don’t misunderstand. I’m not saying I’ll never have gluten again. In fact, I may have a slice of pizza tonight. But gluten (and other non-Paleo stuff) will be an occasional thing – I plan to stay 90% Paleo from here on out.

Anyway, that’s my post-Whole30 update. Now I’ve got to go get ready for work. I expect it to be a very crazy day. I’ll be back soon!